This week, after cracking the case of the missing cat litter, Batman is again undercover in the field. This time he is trying to crack a hipster ring by planting himself at gourmet coffee shops and clutches. Word is that the hipsters are, according to clues left by their leader, Jack White of the White Stripes, plotting to launch a full scale drum circle assault on Gotham City Square during the mayor’s speech later this week.
The Batman will need all of his wits and crime fighting gusto to defeat the evils of the hipster threat. I spoke with Alfred this week and got the skinny on new weapons and tools Batman has implemented to help him with this threat such as: Flannel Cape and Cowl camo, Black-framed night vision goggles, and Batarangs made out of recycled soda bottles and grocery bags. Those rotten hipsters won’t know what hit them.